Death doulas

The word “doula” comes from the Greek word meaning “person who serves.” Doulas are now well recognized as helping when we bring life into the world and there seems to be just as much opportunity to support people as one leaves it. 

A death doula, also known as an end-of-life doula, death midwife or end of life guide, is a non-medical professional who provides support, guidance, and care to individuals and families during the dying process and after death.  The role of a death doula is to provide emotional, spiritual, and practical support, helping the dying person and their loved ones to navigate the end-of-life experience in a way that is meaningful and comfortable for them.

Some of the tasks that a death doula may perform include:

• Providing emotional support and companionship to the dying person and their loved ones

• Educating the family about the dying process and what to expect

• Helping the family to create a peaceful and comfortable environment for the dying person

• Advocating for the dying person's wishes and needs

• Assisting with legacy work, such as creating a memory book or recording messages for loved ones

• Providing practical support, such as running errands or preparing meals for the family

• Offering spiritual and religious support, if requested

Death doulas do not provide medical care or make medical decisions, but work in conjunction with medical professionals to provide holistic end-of-life care. The goal of a death doula is to help the dying person and their loved ones to experience a peaceful and meaningful transition, and to honour the dying person's wishes and needs as much as possible.

End of life doula Mangda Sengvanhpheng of BACII says she was called to this work after experiencing the loneliness of caring for a parent through death. She wishes she could have had guide to help plan, solve challenges, and make the experience more personal and special. So this is what she does for others now. She’s written more about what a doula does on her Medium blog.

“In much of our society, we no longer know how to be with a dying person. As End-of-Life Doulas, we provide a consistent and supportive presence throughout the journey, bringing compassion and warmth alongside knowledge and experience to navigate the myriad of programs and services, that often can be confusing, disconnected, under-resourced and ultimately impersonal.” says Sarah Farr of Wishstone.

Death doula work is a growing profession and you can find local providers through the International Death Doula Association. In Canada at the End of Life Doula Association, U.S. information can be found at the National End of Life Doula Alliance and in the UK at End of Life Doula UK. And Going with Grace has a directory for US and International death doulas trained in their program.

Death doulas charge an hourly rate of anywhere from $30 to $130 or an all-in flat flee of approx $1,000 to $1,500. 

Some death doulas whose work inspires us:

• Canada - With Avery Doula, Wishstone, Sacred Deathcare

• U.S. - Alua Arthur of Going with Grace, BACII, Peacing Out, Breath to Death

• UK - Doing Death

Resources:

Podcast: How to Live So We Can Die Peacefully with Death Doula Alua Arthur